Exploring your relationship and pushing sexual boundaries with your partner, by having a threesome can be an exhilarating experience and one surefire way to spice up your relationship and your bedroom.
Threesomes in a relationship, whilst a fantasy that many of us long to experience, can potentially have some negative implications on your relationship should you fail to navigate the situation correctly.
The good news is that we have conducted extensive research in order to provide some handy tips and trips for you. When you’re interested in threesomes in relationships, what you need is some threesome rules to put in place.
Rules for a threesome don’t have to bring down the mood. Rather, they are there to protect the relationship you share with your partner. For couples having a threesome, agreeing on boundaries upfront will avoid any awkwardness, disappointment or jealousy during or after the fact.
In this technologically savvy world that we’re living in, it’s no secret that there are a number of dating sites for threesomes out there to help you on your mission. Read on for the best rules for a threesome to consider before embarking on this exciting journey with your partner.
1. Consider the reasons why you’re interested in having a threesome
It’s no surprise that there are fewer implications for non-committed, casual relationships in which the parties wish to have a threesome than there are for marriages or long-term committed relationships. This is due to the possible lasting impact on the relationship dynamic, however, it can be avoided by getting to the root of the matter.
If the reason you’re looking into having a threesome is to overcome a sense of boredom or a drought within the bedroom, then it may not be the best idea. In order to approve the long-term health of the sex life with your partner, you need to learn how to maintain the excitement and spice together as a unit. That means bringing fresh, creative ideas and enthusiasm into the bedroom.
If instead of this, your solution is looking outside of the relationship for a third party to save the relationship from staleness and boredom, then it’s bound to be a short-term fix, and you’ll be continuously seeking that fix over and over again.
In this case, we recommend exploring other fantasies, techniques, locations, and preferences that the two of you have, to be enjoyed by the two of you. As exciting as the idea of couples having a threesome can seem on the surface, it’s important to be sure you’re doing it for the right reasons.
2. It’s vital to choose the third party very carefully
When it comes to threesome rules, this one is one of the most important rules you will find. If you’re one of the couples having a threesome fantasy that you’ve decided to act on, it won’t be long before the topic of who the third person should be will arise and pose a very serious question.
Whilst it may be tempting to gravitate towards a familiar face, this can be a terrible mistake that there is no coming back from. Extending a threesome invitation to a person who one or both of you already has some kind of connection with raises the stakes in a way where it becomes far more likely that at least one of you will get your feelings hurt.
So, what are your other options? Well, as it’s recommended to find a stranger to who you’re both attracted, you will need to know where to look. Hiring a professional escort is a viable option and one which avoids any chance of any emotional issues as it is transactional in nature.
Picking up a third in a bar can also be challenging. It’s not the easiest thing in the world to approach a stranger and offer them a place in your bed with you and your partner. In our opinion, the best place to find a threesome is online threesome websites.
One of the many modern, user-friendly, and intelligent platforms can provide the perfect place for you and your partner to scroll through pictures and profiles of sexy singles and see who tickles your fancy.
Once you’ve decided on a third, it’s a good idea to meet up in public and do the standard catfish test, establish a connection, check that the chemistry is flowing, and break the ice, before heading straight into the bedroom.
3. As with anything in life, safety should come first
As previously mentioned, it’s a good idea to meet in public for the first time. In addition, sexually transmitted infections and unwanted pregnancies should be prevented through the use of condoms and sexual health checks. Keeping drug and alcohol use to a minimum is also a good idea, in order for everyone to maintain a clear and level head and to ensure boundaries are adhered to.
4. Write up a checklist with your partner
When introducing threesome rules in a relationship, coming up with a checklist can ensure everyone is comfortable with the sex acts performed.
For instance, some couples may enforce a no-penetration rule. Others opt for a look but don’t touch approach. Some even place no limit on sexual activity but try to minimise intimacy such as kissing and cuddling.
Whatever it is that ends up occurring when you and your partner end up having a threesome, it is so important that the two of you and your third are all comfortable with everything that happens.
You and your partner should sit down and go over every possible sexual act and scenario that could possibly occur, and put them into the category of either ‘acceptable’ or ‘off limits’. In order to establish the safest, both physically and emotionally, experience for all parties, these boundaries are the key.
5. Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable with your partner
Not just in terms of your quest for a threesome, but in general daily life, communication should be at the forefront of your relationship with your partner. For couples looking for a third, the way they can discuss delicate subjects will determine the impact the event will have on the future of the relationship.
If you’re just going along for the ride, and aren’t overly enthusiastic about the threesome, it’s important to be able to communicate that to your partner. If you go through with it purely to make your partner happy, it could spell disaster.
6. A safe word is always a great idea
When having a threesome with your partner and a third party, despite how prepared and emotionally ready you may feel, there’s no way to know exactly how you will feel when you’re actually in the situation.
For this reason, it’s a really good idea to have a safe word ready if you or your partner begin to feel uncomfortable at any stage. Once one of you has spoken that word, it should mean the immediate end to the encounter with no questions asked and no hard feelings.
7. Decide on the leader
It’s a helpful idea to identify one of you as the instigator or leader of the sexual encounter with your third. Who will make the first move? Who will be the one to politely end the threesome if one of you becomes uncomfortable?
Although all of these administrative matters can seem very unsexy, they are incredibly important to discuss and be on the same page with.
8. Establish and respect firm boundaries
Before you even begin the journey to find a threesome, one of the best things you can do for your relationship is to establish and maintain boundaries. For instance - who will be the one who keeps contact with the third? Will it be a one-time thing? Will they be sleeping over? Is there going to be cuddling and breakfast, or will they be leaving immediately?
If you’re both wanting this to be a repeated occurrence, will you be comfortable seeing the same person multiple times or will you need to find a new third each time? Feelings need to be considered at all times, to prevent things from getting out of hand.
9. Communicate clearly with the third
Whilst it’s true that your priority will naturally be the health of your relationship and your partner’s feelings, it’s also important to discuss the expectations and boundaries with the third party.
They need to also feel comfortable calling time and bowing out at any point should they feel uncomfortable, and their sexual and emotional boundaries are just as valid as yours and your partner’s.
10. Always be honest with your partner
Regardless of anything else that happens, before, during, and after the threesome, it is vital to always maintain honesty and transparency with your partner. If you don’t like the third they want to invite into your bedroom, if you begin feeling uncomfortable, or if you’ve changed your mind about some of the items on your sex checklist. Whatever it is, protect your relationship through the power of effective communication.